episode 25: " you will live in happiness too... like the oompa loompa Doopadee doo!"

So yeah.
i was asked not to contact someone
i honored that request ( like a little bitch i might add)
but as usual.. curiosity kills the cat and yeah...I really should watch what I say and for that matter to whom i say it to. I mean look at it like this, being my usual free wheelin self has lost me some Really good people because i Fail to see that confidentiality rarely ever goes both ways especially if youre the new guy . Call it a life lesson but ive had Several things come back to me on some he said she said ish.. and yeah.. I said I know i said though i may not remember in detail wich then gets thrown into the pile of me talkin wrecklessly when infact it could have been as small as me agreeing with something that i saw that somebody else brought up. since when does the hypeman get the credit for the diss yo... its cool though Ive learned some of my lesson. and I admit it'll take some time ( as if the 10 years before me ) to digest . this would be the point where i say if i could take it all back I would but ... nah because the other people involved would still be the same.
other people.. I put way too much on them. and it hurts me when they hurt themselves or other people or worse me.

and who am i to try and right some other persons wrongs... why was it that when one of my musical aquaintences SCREWED OVER one of his most loyal and helpful friends , I was quick to jump in and try to save the world... Not one of those people would have done that for me they woulda both let me take my lumps like a grown up and then hit me with an "i told ya so" .

I cant play the hero anymore because im increasingly becoming an annoyance or worse.. a villain
it sucks that i gotta step outta my fantasy world in order to grasp reality for what it is because i built this world that i live in to cope with the real world. but it's a change that i welcome with open arms , clean ears, and a bulletproof vest on.

point blank If i ever spoke out of pocket concerning you... and yeah.. im talkin to you ...im sorry, it might not mean much to you but im sorry and hopefully we can at least shake hands on that note.

and ...to that red-headed goddess somewhere north of here, its not the lies that caught up to me, its not this "passive -aggressive" standpoint that im charged with, but my own childish behavior that i've had trouble shaking. well I think i got a somewhat grip on it but too late to still get a minute of your time.

I'll be happier next episode... I just had to get this off my chest in order to breathe right

episode 26:Title.. what title

So Ive got a show on the day before my birthday. thought it would be the blowout of the year but nah.. its a short like 10 minute short jawn so im thinkin maybe a cover song will do.

episode 24: 400 dollars in the hole and i didnt even get a hooker.

so i got burnt for a sampler over EBAY. fucking texas jerkoffs.
and i lost out on not one but 3( count em) 3 gigs this weekend

gig one:
I run into the arcade( big mistake) and tony corners me, says his DJ cant make it till 2 and he needs someone to cover for his Party that he's holding at a reputable location. now i shoulda called bullshit right there and in any other case i would have, but this was an associate, a friend. Everybody knew the party was bogus but me. and in hindsight i shoulda got my dough upfront, but my policy is friends in need i dont ask for cash up front unless im missing out on another paying opportunity. long story short. 10 pm rolls around and tony is nowhere to be found. either he skated out or found another dj and just didnt call me to say so.

gig 2: the bar called, no gig tonite... i honestly dont think they like me very much and for the price im getting paid there... not really worth it but theyre good people i guess. I'm gonna keep an ear out for other gigs. maybe start working with Dj no-chaser Fulltime.

gig 3: speaking if No chaser, his big gig that was supposed to be my recurring money maker fell right on thru hard on its ass, so i spun at Phsh's place

but as usual it was a short spin, just a set up , i got off , it was good. came home high and now im here, 400 in the hole. sheeyat.

Drop that chick, now roll with it

yep.. got rid of her, oh well. send in the next jawn or bring back the ex jawn. I'd like another go at serena but nah.. lets keep it moving forward, i cant stop now, even if i dont know what im doing.

So my new girl got a tatoo on her back

and it means Ninja. did i mention I'm dating again.


I hope nobody gets mad, I can think of 2 folks that might feel a little Raw about it, but its cool
at least she found me this time.

episode 22: what it is what it aint what it do

2 weeks in my new home, no xbox, no tv, and i suck at ccp online... i cant seem to find the time. im not even all the way in here yet and im low on cash, bored( who knew sex was such a big chunk of my time) , and on this day after valentines day, im kinda kicking myself .. not over the girls that didnt want me, but the ones that did ( and i said no to) theres sharon and serena of course, dumped em and i could choke myself for it but im a better man for leaving both of those girls. theyre waaay better people now and that growth couldnt have come under my clingy egotistical shadow. theres !.. noo wait .. there was never , i was only fooling myself. hmm... oh wait.. nicole... yeh thats a case of " i dont think i can handle an older woman" i mean i was a bitter divorcee with a sex drive. if i had the chance, id opt to be friends with benefits and build from there but like all the others, its cool, best of luck to ya... cutie pie


next episode maybe ill dive into why im ending up the "woman" in the bedroom, and why that sexist statement is probably the only way to logically explain this phenomenon


ep:23.... aintshitpussy.

Still.. breakin spines in the 2-0-0-9

YES BITCHES.. dont call it a comeback. Call it a ressurection. Im back at work, back in school and i have an apartment!! still single tho...BOOO